that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Randomize
