Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Couch. On fire.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
