I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
