he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
God I need to hump something, right now.
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