"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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