hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize
