i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
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