She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I have grass duct taped all over my body
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Randomize
