.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Randomize
