You just made me feel so damn special
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Randomize
