Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
