we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
