Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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