If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
