Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Randomize
