I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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