i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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