I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
