Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
and i looked up. we had an audience...
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
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