so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
