HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
