So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
he laminated a picture of his dick.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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