well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
