I must be too annoying 4 u.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Randomize
