I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
