STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Randomize
