I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
