I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Randomize
