So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
i need an iv and a liver transplant
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
