I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
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