halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
