Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
