YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Swine flu is the new snow day.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
