Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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