i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
ok first of all what the fuck
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