There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Randomize