dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Everything about him screamed your future.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Randomize
