When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
