she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize
