Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
