I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Randomize
