Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
