I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Randomize
