I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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