they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
