i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Randomize
