butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Randomize
