I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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