Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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