if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
